Pro-Life or Pro-Birth?



Last Friday Washington saw it’s largest pro-life march ever; in fact it was the largest pro-life march the world has seen.  Tens of thousands, mostly women, paraded is support of  the reversal of Roe v. Wade and the end of the right to choose  – to abort if one wishes – in America.

The religious were there in full cry and for the first time a sitting Vice President spoke at the rally.  He promised that President Trump would nominate a Supreme Court Justice worthy to follow “the great Justice Scalia.”   The hopes of pro-life groups to overturn Roe v. Wade have never been greater.

Now of course no one is forced to have an abortion under the current law and pro-life supporters know that.  No.  Pro-life groups want to ensure that no one else has that choice either.  Pro-life groups want abortion banned for all.  Many want it banned in all circumstances including rape, incest and most extreme – including danger to the life of the mother.  After all, it is God’s will.

It makes no difference that a clear majority of Americans wish to leave the law as it is with support of the pro-life position hovering at around 37%.  On the other hand, a clear majority of American white women voted for Trump and the vast majority of the marchers last Friday were white women.

What’s an old white guy to make of it?  It doesn’t affect me directly anymore and my daughters are approaching the end of their child bearing years.  I have no grand daughters.  so why should I care?

Why not let women and fathers with young daughters and grand daughters fight it out?

On Saturday I read a short quote by a religious, Sister  Joan Chittister, OSB, a Benedictine nun.


Those of you who know me or read me are aware that my wife and I lost two sons before we had our two daughters.  Our second son lived to be ten years old and was total care all of his life.  When he was born we didn’t know  our trial was coming; that my wife, the girl I married out of high school, would spend the next ten years of her life caring for a child who would remain forever a quiet infant and die in my arms.

I really don’t need anyone who hasn’t experienced what we went through telling us what a “blessing” it was; that God only sends us the burdens He knows we can carry.   It is really easy to say such words when you are not the parents or haven’t gone through anything similar and have no intention of putting yourself out.  Hey!  Shit happens!  Glad it wasn’t me it happened to!!

Today the tests for determining such things are readily available.

What would you do if you found out a Michael was coming your way?  What choice would you make?  Today you are allowed to make your choice and answer to your own God yourself or to no god at all.

When I was young Sherri Finkbein made her choice.  She had to go to Sweden to exercise her choice.  You can read about her here:

Those marching last Friday would take that choice away from you and then as Sister Chittister points out, would do little or nothing to to help you.   No one helped us.  We were entirely on our own and most people today who are profoundly disabled or have profoundly disabled children still are. They do nothing but worry what will happen to their child when they are gone.  We did.

I’ll tell you what will happen.  Their child’s well being will be in the hands of total strangers.  Maybe.  There is little empathy in our country today.  There is only righteousness.

Not too long ago I wrote a comment on a very conservative website concerning an anti-choice article.  I wrote of the trials and heartaches we went through and how the woman I loved gave a decade and a career caring for a child who was not capable of the slightest interaction; a child whose death was a blessing.  Not his birth.  His death.

I indicated that was why I supported choice.  I would condemn no woman, not even one to such heartache and years of agony.

The responses I received contained not one iota of empathy.  Not one.  “Good thing this guy’s not in charge!  Guess he hasn’t read the Constitution!”

To the righteous reading this post I would quote Matthew:

“Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples: “The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. So you must be careful to do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach.  They tie up heavy, cumbersome loads and put them on other people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.”  Matthew 23.

About toritto

I was born during year four of the reign of Emperor Tiberius Claudius on the outskirts of the empire in Brooklyn. I married my high school sweetheart, the girl I took to the prom and we were together for forty years until her passing in 2004. We had four kids together and buried two together. I had a successful career in Corporate America (never got rich but made a living) and traveled the world. I am currently retired in the Tampa Bay metro area and live alone. One of my daughters is close by and one within a morning’s drive. They call their pops everyday. I try to write poetry (not very well), and about family. Occasionally I will try a historical piece relating to politics. :-)
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10 Responses to Pro-Life or Pro-Birth?

  1. I don’t feel as though I have the right to tell someone else what to do with their body. And I don’t understand why no emphasis is being placed on the fact that men play a huge role in fathering a child.

    Instead of ‘Planned Parenthood’, how about we try ‘Planned Fatherhood’ where the emphasis is placed on the male’s role in reproduction since ‘Planned Parenthood’ is really all about the female’s role in reproduction. I would love to see how that plays out.

    And thank you for sharing with us what had to be a most painful period in the lives of you and your wife Toritto and of course, everyone else in your family. My heart aches for what you had to go through. And now you have precious little Clark to look up at you and smile that most beautiful smile. Keep close to him Toritto, although I know you will. These are trying times and I fear for the future of the little ones who are so innocent.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. jfwknifton says:

    Years ago, I met someone who had a child similar to your son. She was a nice person and she said exactly the same as you about the situation.As regards abortion in general, surely the woman should choose. Having said that, I have never understood why unwanted babies can’t be given to childless couples.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. leggypeggy says:

    A powerful, beautiful, wise and heartfelt post. Thank you.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. a fabulous post.

    “There is only righteousness.”

    Liked by 1 person

  5. beetleypete says:

    All very true, Frank, and from the heart (and experience) as usual.
    I have never had (nor wanted) any children. But I have always been 100% in favour of a woman’s right to choose whether or not to have a child. Unwanted children in foster homes, severely disabled children suffering only a vestige of a life on occasion, as well as rape victims, women with medical problems, and those unaware of the process, not even knowing that they were pregnant. There is much more to this issue than just some promiscuous women using abortion as retrospective birth control, that’s for sure.
    Best wishes, Pete.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. wfdec says:

    I have a brother who has a son who is totally dependent upon him and his wife for care. twenty one years and counting. “What will happen when we die?” is his constant concern.
    This is a very salutary post. Well said.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. toritto says:

    wfdec – I know. I’ve been in their shoes. Regards from Florida


  8. Pro-fetus, anti-children.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. People have a right to believe in religious dogma but when they think that legislation affecting the rest of us should be based on that dogma, that’s not OK. When they can provide scientific proof for the existence of the soul, I’ll accept their right to control other people’s bodies. And as you say, far too many Christians are all about Thou Shalt Not – they really don’t give a damn about what they SHOULD do. Apparently, being gay is certain damnation while never lifting a finger to help people who need it never affected anyone’s chances of getting into Heaven.

    Liked by 1 person

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